I’m the oldest of three rambunctious boys. As kids, we would rarely sit still. When my mom demanded we sit quietly for a timeout, it felt like an unbearable punishment. Now as an English teacher, the irony of my growing interest in mindfulness and meditation as an educator is not lost on me. I think back to how we would rebel, racing through the house like it was an obstacle course. Stillness was something we resisted and even resented.
Growing up, sports were my outlet. I struggled, however, with anxiety: fear of the future, fear of failure, and fear of other people’s opinions. The pressure I put on myself often clouded my ability to enjoy games. In my junior year of high school, I faced similar challenges plus the pressure to excel if I wanted to compete in college. After four demanding years of boarding school, I was more than fortunate to be recruited to play lacrosse at the University of Pennsylvania, where the pressures of being a student-athlete at an Ivy League school only intensified. Looking back, I now wonder how mindfulness practices could have helped me cope with the anxiety and stress I felt daily.
Then, almost four years after college, I lost my brother Conor to suicide in February 2000. An incredible athlete, he wrestled with mental illness throughout his years in high school and college. When I discovered the mindfulness practices of yoga and meditation in early 2001, I began to find a way through the darkness of grief. Mindfulness offered a way to process my emotions and a path to healing. I only wish Conor had these tools to manage his mental health.
Mindfulness practices have become a cornerstone of how I approach teaching, coaching, and living. That’s why I am passionate about sharing them with students so that they can navigate their own challenges with perseverance and clarity.
As an educator and coach, I see how mindfulness equips students with tools to handle anxiety, build resilience, and develop a balanced approach to life’s challenges — both inside and outside the classroom. I feel that I honor Conor’s memory by fostering a community of compassionate, mindful young men who are prepared to face the world with strength, empathy, and kindness.
Mindfulness offers a powerful way to help students manage daily pressures while enhancing their cognitive performance. Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, a pioneer in mindfulness research at MIT, describes it as “awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally.” This awareness fosters the qualities we seek to cultivate at our school — responsibility for one’s actions, loyalty to one’s community, and consideration for others.
Mindfulness enhances these values by helping students develop self-awareness and self-discipline. As Judson Brewer, MD, from Brown University, emphasizes, “Mindfulness helps us get out of our own way so that we can perform to the best of our abilities.” By recognizing distractions — whether they come from external sources or the inner critic — students can learn to manage their focus and energy more effectively.
But let me be clear: mindfulness is not a cure-all; however, it does offer critical skills for students to excel.
In the highly competitive world of sports, Mindfulness can be a game-changer: athletes stay present, focused, and resilient under pressure. In his book The Mindful Athlete, George Mumford, a sports psychologist who has worked with elite athletes such as Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant, asserts that “Mindfulness helps athletes get into ‘the zone’ more consistently,” allowing them to perform at their best. By focusing on the present moment and visualizing success, athletes can achieve peak performance by reducing anxiety, enhancing concentration, and recovering more effectively from setbacks. Harvard Professor Susan David — a psychologist and author of Emotional Agility — suggests that even a minute of focused breathing can set a positive tone for the day. “For a full minute, do nothing but focus on your breath…Your mind will naturally try to wander. Notice that, and then just let it be.” This simple practice – practiced with consistency – changes the neuroplasticity of the brain, improving academic and athletic performance and fostering the patience and strategic thinking essential for leadership.
Leadership means connecting, mentoring, and serving others with empathy and compassion. Mindfulness cultivates these qualities by creating space between an event and the response it triggers. This intentional pause allows for thoughtful decision-making and compassionate leadership. In his book Master of Change, Brad Stulberg notes, “Skillfully responding to change requires creating space between an event and what you do, or don’t do, about it.” By helping students become more aware of their own emotions and the emotions of others, mindfulness encourages them to listen, share, and be there for others.
Again, mindfulness is not a panacea or a quick-fix trend. And it’s not a religion; it’s a secular practice with positive health effects, supported by scientific research. It’s a skill that, when practiced consistently, can have profound long-term benefits. In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear emphasizes the importance of rituals in building sustainable habits. He suggests creating a “motivation ritual” to make mindfulness more enjoyable and consistent. Clear shares how “emotions drive behavior” according to neuroscience. Therefore, whether it’s a pregame meditation routine for athletes or a daily breathing exercise for students, mindfulness can be integrated into everyday life.
"Mindfulness isn’t difficult. We just need to remember to do it."
Here are some mindfulness practices that can significantly enhance performance in academic, athletic, and social settings:
Start the day or any high-pressure situation with mindful breathing. Spend five minutes focusing on your breath, inhaling deeply through the nose and exhaling slowly through the mouth. This simple practice can calm the mind, reduce anxiety, and prepare you for the task ahead. In a moment of overwhelm during a competition or a stressful test, take a double inhale, hold your breath, and fully exhale with a big sigh. Repeat, if necessary, to calm the parasympathetic nervous system by filling and emptying the lungs.
Before a test or competition, take a few minutes to mentally scan your body from head to toe, noticing any areas of tension. As you breathe deeply, imagine releasing that tension with each exhale. This practice helps athletes and students alike enter a state of relaxed concentration.
At the start of each day or a free period, spend a few minutes journaling. Write about your thoughts, emotions, or goals for the day. This practice not only helps clear the mind but also encourages the habit of mind of metacognition — thinking about your thinking — which can enhance problem-solving and decision-making skills.
Before a performance, whether in sports or academics, take a few minutes to visualize success. Imagine yourself completing the task with ease and confidence. Visualization can reinforce positive outcomes and boost self-confidence.
Reflect on three things you are grateful for and write them down. This simple exercise shifts focus away from stress and negativity, fostering a positive mindset that can enhance overall well-being and performance.
As we foster mindfulness in schools, we create an environment where students can grow into compassionate, self-aware leaders ready to navigate the complexities of the modern world with clarity and confidence. Mindfulness allows students to find moments of calm and peace amidst the challenges of school life, developing their potential and preparing them for the journey ahead. And in the attention economy of a digital world, inundated with AI and ubiquitous screens, it’s imperative we mindfully disconnect from devices, in order to reconnect with ourselves, our students, our communities, and our families.
Let’s practice.
The conversation continues on the Boys Education Series podcast! Listen on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Subscribe on your favorite streaming platform.